let's get crazy

Let's get crazy,
Talk about our big plans
Places that you're going
Places that I haven't been
Build my walls up
Concrete castle
Keep this kingdom free of hassle, yeah

When I am interested in a guy and he moves too fast I will immediately be turned off. No questions asked. If I like a guy and he moves too slow I will become bored and move on. There is a window of opportunity where it has a chance to move forward. Some people judge based on a first date, nope I judge on if they make a move in that window of time. If they don't are they really worth my time? My answer is no.

I've always wondered how divorced people adjust to not having the other person with them at big events. By getting married you're promising to be there for each others big events for forever. I don't know how every time they go somewhere they don't think that whoever their ex spouse is should be there too. I think that would be the part that hurts long after the initial pain. Of course, I haven't been married or divorced so I'm not sure. I have been hurt though, and sometimes I think that about you. I go somewhere and think you should be there too. I know with more and more time that will pass-we didn't promise forever.

I have a perpetual feeling of nervousness, when I have nothing to be nervous about. Thus, I feel sick and on edge. I think I have a hunch where it is coming from, but I don't know how to make it stop. I keep trying to convince myself that it isn't anything, but I think until that's proven the feeling will stay. Urg. 

I need to go to bed.

Is it Friday yet?

Dark Blue

Have you ever been alone in a crowded room?

My favorite is leaving Denver tomorrow. I'm beyond sad about this. I was talking to Cindy Lou last night and she was like..oh I get it. When something starts for you something else has to end. Grad school is starting so I'll be busy, but my favorite is leaving, and that sucks. Tonight is Jacksons, and it's going to be AWESOME. I promise I'll have stories.

"that's what people do -- they move into their new life and disassemble the old life in some ungrateful way and leave it out by the curb. like it never served any purpose at all. like self-preservation is some frivolous little thing." - Girls' Poker Night by Jill A. Davis

In other news. Wanna know how I know I live in CO? I just joined a Gym. Because, you know I have time to work full time, be a full time graduate student, AND go to a gym everyday. I'll make it work. I am better busy. Though it may interfere with watching Vampire Diaries...

This song brings me back, and takes me forward. I just genuinely like it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Eb_X8rcf0aU&ob=av2n
Sorry I can't get the video to show up on my page right now. Lame.

Also, don't get me started on the CO DMV.

Have a great weekend kids!

"I was looking for a fantasy... sometimes reality's just not what you're looking for." -Cindy Morgan

9/11

Where were you when the world stopped turning that September day? I was a freshman in high school-more specifically I was in study hall. I don't think I'll ever forget that day.

My heart goes out to everyone who lost their jobs, while just being at work. What a scary-terrifying way to go. To have to jump or burn? To be in a building collapsing-it's something I can't imagine.  I'm so grateful to the 343 firefighters that gave their lives that day...I'm also above thankful my brother was not there. He would not have left the buildings until everyone he could save was out, my brother would have died. The firefighter thing hits too close to home. They were just doing their jobs.

I spent today at the park. Colorado hosted an all day event to remember. There were speeches, a military parade, gun salute and jet fly over the capital.  There were parts of the twin towers that fell. It was a bitter sweet day. it was nice to take the time to remember everything, and see how far we have come. It's just heartbreaking how many people lost their lives all because of hatred.

 After the ceremony the Beach Boys gave a concert. It might seem odd, but it was exactly what we needed. We took the time to remember and then celebrated how far we have come. As you can see me and Cathy were front row center. They performed for 2 hours.

10 years from now I don't think I will forget this day. It was one of those perfect amazing Denver weekends. It showed that Osama didn't win. We are still the home of the free and the land of the brave, but we haven't forgotten.

Falling Down

I stay busy so I don't think about you. It works most the time. It's not working right now, so I'm reading quotes. Quotes always work. I am also listening to Something Corporate-I have recently got back into them. It's like a hug from my DC days. Country is annoying me...yup, something has changed within me.

I keep reading books written that have so much heart and truth I know they have to be based on a true story. Usually when I read the information about the author I find that I'm correct. Someday I'm going to write a book. Not yet, but I will. I remember telling Doug that I read when I'm depressed, but that's not true. I read when I'm growing.

I had a nice weekend, I have bangs now. I love them and promise to post pictures soon.

Stay happy kids.

Keep in Mind

I have a cold. Please tell me who the heck gets a cold in August. Apparently I do. I can't breath out of either nostrils-and that just seems unsafe. I'm not one of those people who get sick and suffer through it. I complain a lot. I'm just bad at it. SO If I have been in a bad mood (I have) it's because I have been getting sick.  On the plus side I get to inhale Vicks and that makes me happy. Obviously it's the little things.

I went to Ikea with Ashley. I bought a really cool dresser. Scratch that. I bought a box of wood. Thank goodness Ash helped me put it together. I would have cried. I can manage a book shelf, a dresser is beyond my abilities. At least I acknowledge that.

I went grocery shopping today--which I hate. Especially now that I live and work and don't leave the bubble that is downtown. It was a cluster. Note to self don't drive anywhere during rush hour. I'm going to attempt to eat better, or cheaper at least. Lets see how this goes...

I really like this song...it's just nice. Doesn't really pertain to me directly but none the less it makes me smile. So I hope you enjoy it.

 I got my invite to Casey and Kristen's wedding. So Ohio I will be making an appearance in September! Just can't believe my age group is old enough to be married. People say everyone thinks that until they meet who they want to marry. WELL I'll let you know when that happens if my thought have changed.

At this point I'm rambling, but it's REALLY hot and I can't breath. Sleeping is not going to go well tonight. 
I have to try though...wish me luck!

Sleepy

This is more than I usually post. I should be sleeping. The dishes are done, the closets are even organized. I guess I'm not sure what to do with myself tonight. That sentence made me sound old. I'm just tired, but I want to properly say goodbye to May. June is upon us, and June means summer. And summer means new beginnings.

I'm sorta in love with this song right now: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jdlTt3E7w4Y
I like that it mentions Colorado AND London. Sorry I have a one track mind and it's stuck on London. Deal with it. Geez I'm tired. This isn't me saying goodbye at all.

So May-it's been real. It's been fun...kinda. There have been some big upsides to May. I can't deny that, but for now changes are coming. I can smell it. Or maybe the smell isn't change. Perhaps it's my super awesome birthday cake candle. Be jealous.

Ok I'm going to bed. Sorry for this irrelevant post.

Taste of Colorado

I fell in love with Denver all over again tonight.

It was the taste of Colorado this week. Which basically means the city shuts down a big part of downtown and turns it into a festival. It's an awesome setting, and it's free. I don't know of many cities that shut down main streets for music and fun! Did I mention it's a block away from my apartment? ANYWAYS tonight me and Sam went and saw Bret Michaels! There were a ton of people so it was super crowded, but we made it to the front. It was just really cool.

I was apprehensive but it turned out to be a good weekend. Last night me and Sally went out for $1.75 margaritas. Yummy! then we met up with a couple of her friends and had a mini-dance party. Sally referred to the night as Epic. Ha.

Tommorow I must finish my essay for grad school. Other than that all I have to do it wait for one more letter of recommendation to come in then I am good to go. Application complete and I will know in two weeks. If it doesn't happen that just means there is something different I'm supposed to be doing. I'm excited to find out :)